Stay-at-Home Panda

Stay-at-Home Panda

An adventure of triumphs and troubles as a mother, wife, and woman

I’m a Mom, and I’m Still Hot

I recently published 8 Subtle Signs You’re an Adult. It’s about the understated ways I finally realized I’m a real-life adult, like the fact that I now wipe down walls and willingly pay extra for convenience. I wrote that I recently invested in a one-piece bathing suit, saying that I now value comfort and ease over flaunting around my hot body. The editor changed the wording to “my once-hot body”. When I first saw her change I thought, “Whoa, what a bold assumption! Why does she think my body isn’t hot anymore?” Certainly, I feel hot. I was tempted to send her a full body shot, but I could see how she came to this conclusion. I mentioned that my butt now resembles my mother’s and that the skin around my stomach is looser than it used to be. I guess she imagined I was rocking a mom-bod in a bad way. I let her modification slide, thinking that maybe it’s what other moms relate to.

After publishing the piece, I felt unrest about the wording, because it changed my truth, and maybe even perpetuates the notion that women are no longer hot after having children. I am a mom to two young boys, and I feel great about the way that I look. Despite some of the changes my body went through, I look good. It’s pretty effortless too- lately the only exercise I do is in the form of schlepping my children around and taking family walks. I am a mom, and I am hot. Say it with me ladies, I am a mom, and I am hot.

It’s true that I don’t care much about how my butt looks in a pair of jeans, but it’s not because I have lost hope in my apple bottom. It’s more about not feeling like a piece of ass anymore. I belong so completely to my boys (husband included) that I am not nearly as occupied with finding the jeans that do me the most justice. I am not luring anyone in with bait. My husband appreciates my ass, but he loves me for my mind, my heart, and the way I mother our children. I don’t need to try on fourteen pairs of pants before I leave the house, because I am a very settled down mother and wife, and that is what makes me feel like an adult.

It’s true that the skin on my stomach is a little looser than it was two kids ago. It’s also true that I bought a one-piece bathing suit this past summer. However, I did not buy the bathing suit because of the loose skin. In fact, I check my stomach out in the mirror every morning as I get dressed, and I am completely impressed with it. It expanded to the most amazing lengths to encase and protect fully grown babies, and now it is surprisingly flat. When I peep it, I nod my head with surprise and approval.  I got the one-piece because we were going to the pool every single day and I thought one piece was easier to find and manage than two pieces. If you know me at all, you know that I can never find my shit. Plus, my little boys are constantly pulling on me. My tits and ass were always falling out of my bikinis, and I felt so disheveled all the time. Again, I am a mother and a wife, and I care less about flaunting my hot (yes, I said HOT) body.

What I was trying to say before is that I feel like an adult because I obsess less over my body. By having a loving husband and a family of my own, I feel secure. I have matured to know that I am so much more than flesh and curves. Although I love the way I look, I don’t rely on it for attention and affection. When I was a teen or young adult, I felt more of a need to flaunt what I had. Now, the person that matters to me knows exactly what I have, and I’m no longer interested in drawing unwanted attention. It’s not that I feel inclined to cover up, but I make choices that are practical and comfortable. How adult is that?

I am a mom, and I am still hot. I love my body, but without obsession. I am a hot piece of ass but I am also a mother and wife. I am appreciated for my body, yet understood for my mind and heart. I am comfortable in my skin, and that makes me feel like an adult.


About Amanda Elder

Amanda has a background in education, but now spends most of her time snuggling her kids, wiping their butts, and doing house chores in her underwear.


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